Snipett. Karate Kid.
Karate Kid. African American Male. Karate Kid. Moves to China. African American Male. Karate Kid. African American Male.
What is this?
That’s the question I asked myself during this new Action-Flick staring Jaden Smith as the “Karate Kid.” As an Asian American, you can imagine, watching an African American kid play the Karate Kid sucks. It really does. And to top it off… he doesn’t even learn karate.
How can an African American family be relocated to China? It’s ridiculously insane. I can’t even sleep at night… And of course! with enough Yellow Fever taking over our white buddies here, not only does Jaden get the Asian girl, he has to beat up all the Asian kids while he’s at it.
Not only have African Americans killed our dreams of being professional athletes, now I can’t even learn Kung Fu.
Why can’t I learn kung fu? Because now, a black guy knows kung fu. That only means that now Asian’s in general will be no match for their superior fast-twitch muscles and superior genetics.
I wish I was African American. I would have a viable chance to become a professional athlete, rapper, singer, dancer, comedian, move-star, etc.
As an Asian American? Well… As the Tolkien Asian American at work, without a background in computers or engineering, I am constantly bombarded with IT questions…
“I know you’re not the IT, but do you think you can help me with…”
NO I cannot help you with THIS! I cannot help you because you’re too ignorant to see beyond the social stereotypes which plague your perception of the world around you. I cannot help you because I am not your “Model Minority” and I will not SHUT UP and do as you say. I cannot help you because I don’t know shit about how to fix your computer. BUT unfortunately, or fortunately, I do know how to fix your computer because I am Asian American.
I ONCE aspired to become an engineer because my parents wanted me to. I ONCE aspired to be an engineer because ONCE I reached age 16 and realized I wouldn’t be taller than 5’5 my dreams of being in the NBA were shattered. I ONCE aspired to be an engineer because while growing up, we didn’t have any role models besides our fathers and mothers who were engineers. I ONCE aspired to be an engineer because I was supposed to be good at MATH.
Unfortunately, and often times I wonder… Am I a reject to my own community? My culture? My roots? Did the genes pass me by? I am not good at math. I do not excel through numbers. And I certainly never wanted to be an engineer, but what else was I to be?
I am Asian America and I’d be happy if my kid’s are taller than 5’5.
I’ll just keep on dreaming…