Random Thoughts. Random Times.

Yelp. Who cares.

Yelp is a god-send. We’ll never go anywhere and have a bad experience ever again. So worth it.

Go online, check your Yelp app, done deal.

I love it! I don’t even remember the last time I had a “bad” experience. Thanks to Yelp, I’ll never have one again, guaranteed.

Yelp has changed the way we go out. We don’t dare try a new restaurant without checking Yelp first. We don’t dare trying anything unless it has a +3 Star rating or even +4 for the Yelping Elite.

And of course who doesn’t visit a restaurant without one of these:

More after this. Click “Continue Reading” on the right for more.

Yelp is just simply put – “The Greatest Website ever INVENTED”

Honestly, if it wasn’t for Yelp, I wouldn’t have wasted so much time scouring the Earth for a great place to eat or visit.

But you know what… Who cares about Yelp. Who really cares about Yelp in the first place. We already have technology dictating our lives more than ever, do we really need another piece of technology added to the list? Do I need a website to tell me where I should eat every night?

What accountability do I have anyways?

Just because “Jennie” with an “Elite” rating is telling me to eat at this restaurant… I should go eat at that restaurant? Who are these people? Why should I trust this “Jennie” ? Did she study this subject extensively and  has now emerged to tell me why this burger tastes better than that burger? Its absurd.

Better yet, I’m tired of the annoying Yelper… You know what I’m talking about. We all have a friend who’s like this, probably multiple ones at that.

It’s the friend where they can never make up their mind unless they “Yelp it.”

Never make a decision, unless they “Yelp it.”

Won’t say yes to a suggestion, unless they “Yelp it.”

Only suggesting things and provides reasons by saying “It had *blank* stars on Yelp.”

All the while subconsciously, we all know they’re insecure as fuck because they fail to see that they are moving through life with their actions dictated by “Elite – Jennie,” (whom they have never met) because they seemingly don’t know how to live or do what they want to do in fear that what they do is not good enough through the eyes of society.

Sad. Yes it is. I feel sorry for these people. People may be reading this blog and be asking themselves… Who cares, Yelp is awesome, and they find great offense from this post. I admit, at the sametime I’ll have to agree with them and say,

“Yelp is awesome, but please strive to live a little and get out of your cyber bubble and dare to have a fucking adventure. “

You know what I love? I fear it may be becoming a lost art, but I love venturing out and discovering for myself what is good and what is not. Yelp is fine in moderation, but the pleasant surprise that a shit-hole restaurant in the middle of nowhere is instantly amazing makes the world complete.

But what makes it even more annoying? They try to go on Yelp and pretend they’re some poet reclaiming their phenomenal experience. Then they justify it by saying they’re immersing into the “Yelp Culture.” So they end up saying things like this:

Seriously… Who talks like that?

And to top things off. Yelp’s brain-trust not only created a great community, they’re playing mafia by forcing innocent restaurant and retailers to pay for monthly “Advertising fee’s.” By paying these fee’s they can see their establishment suddenly rise rapidly through Yelp ranking and not to  mention suddenly receive top-notch reviews. They are brilliant. They come off as innocent and provide the illusion that us small folk will be able to control the review process and speak our mind. But Yelp then turns around and provides an opportunity for businesses to pay to “control” their own reviews. Brilliant.

What is a retailer/ restaurant to do? To deny the fee is sheer suicide for most businesses.

Once again, to all who are able to embrace freedom, I commend you. But I do understand the infamous powers of Yelp, and I too will continue to struggle to break free from it’s awesome powers.

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One response

  1. testingtesting

    September 7, 2010 at 5:18 pm

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